A Practice of Gratitude
As I’ve written before, gratitude is one of
the healthiest approaches to life. I want to continue that
theme a little longer and tell you about some research that has
been done on gratitude and its positive effects. This is an
area that has some of the best demonstrated effects in the
realm of positive psychology.
The Gratitude Exercise
But let’s begin with the end. Here’s a
simple practice that shouldn’t take more than ten minutes or so
a day to complete that has scientifically been shown to improve
the quality of life for those who do it..
The practice is gratitude and the mechanism
is simple. At the end of the day, write down three things that
you witnessed or experienced or otherwise had in you life that
you appreciate and are grateful for. Then write down why you
think it happened.
That’s it.
What the Research Shows
It’s actually been shown that this is more
effective at the end of the day than in the morning and that
three items worked better than ten (a great example of less
being more).
That’s not to say I don’t like to begin my
day with appreciation – for a good cup of coffee if nothing
else.
In multiple studies, that simple exercise
has been shown to increase contentment and decrease symptoms of
depression. One researcher (Chris Peterson) asked people to do
this for one week and was able to measure an improvement in
that little time.
More interesting, when he did a follow up
six months later, he found that sixty percent of the
participants had continued the practice on their own.
One issue some people have when they first
try this is that they aspect have difficulty identifying three
good things. It’s not from the lack of things to be grateful
for. Rather, they’ve gotten out of practice. It’s from a
tendency to, how to put this gently… take things for
granted.
Learning to See What's Really There
I took a drawing class my last year in
college. I had all the science stuff I needed done and wanted
to do something completely different. As I amply demonstrated,
I had no innate skill for drawing, but I loved the class.
The biggest thing I discovered was that the
real skill of drawing isn’t in technique. It’s not how you
apply pencil or charcoal to paper. An artist does have good
technical ability, but their most important skill is the
ability to observe intensely, to look at the world clearly, to
see what’s really there.
A beginner looking at a plate on a table
knows intellectually that the plate is a circle. That knowledge
blocks them from really looking closely. What they see when
they look at it from any angle other than straight down is more
of an ellipse, yet when they put pen to paper, they’ll try to
draw it as a circle based on what they “know”, not what they
see.
It takes quite a lot of practice to get to
the point of seeing what’s really there. Once you do see it,
conveying it to the paper is relatively easy.
In the same way, there’s a small learning
curve to notice the grace notes in life. The good stuff is
there, we just haven’t developed the habit of noticing it.
As I mentioned in my last note, we don’t
have to work on noticing the negative stuff – that will grab
our attention.
Once we start looking for the positive, it
becomes progressively easier to recognize it.
Notice that I’m not saying to make something
up or to but a positive spin on something that appears
undesirable at first flush. There is nothing unrealistic about
this gratitude practice.
Rather, it represents a return to a more
rational, realistic evaluation of their life and circumstances.
It’s taking the time to notice clearly what’s already
there.
Give it a try and let me know what you
think.
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